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I haven't been blogging like I had purposed to do. Not even one post for the month of November! Shame on me. Well, I've been busy caring for my two children. My daughter turned 3 months old a few days ago. My son is now 14 months old. I love those kids to pieces!! I admit that it can be quite a struggle sometimes juggling two children close in age, but, it's manageable.

Being a mother has filled me with so much joy and purpose. I never would have thought that these two precious little people would bring me such delight each day. Of course, they can also be the source of great frustration at times. :)

I've been busy also with freelance writing projects, and trying to earn enough money to pay off my debts. I will be sooooo glad when I am debt-free. Or at least almost there. I would like to get down to just my student loan, and I would be very happy. My goal for 2009 is to pay off my two credit cards.

God is so good. He continues to show me how He provides, when I just simply choose to trust in Him. If you are a young mother who wants to stay at home with her children, trust in the Lord. He will lead you in the way that you should go. There will be bumps in the road, but keep the faith, and he will reward your diligence and faith.

My little blessings

Life has been going great lately. My daughter, India, is six weeks old now. My son is one. I've recovered pretty well from my C-section, and I'm so glad about that. I have enjoyed this time bonding with my kids. I often marvel at how blessed I am to have these two little blessings in my life.

Because of the C-section I can't pick up my son, R.J., like I want to. I get on the floor and play with him though. He's so active, and I enjoy him so much. He makes me laugh all the time with the cute stuff that he does.

India is a quiet baby so far, and, dare I say, kind of spoiled. I read that you can't spoil a newborn baby, but I'm starting to wonder about that. When she's not sleeping she likes to be held. I try to lay her down or sit her in her little chair, and she remains content for about five minutes, and then she hollers. As long as she's being held, she's quiet and content. I need to get a sling, so I can just carry her around as I do things around the house.

All in all, I'm on cloud nine with my little girl and boy. I'm so excited to have a girl and I enjoy all of her little girl things. I'm also so glad that I have a little rough and tough boy who never ceases to amaze me and make me laugh. I just thank God everyday for blessing me. I never would have thought that motherhood would bring me so much joy.

My daugher is here!!

Last Wednesday, September 3rd, my husband and I welcomed our second child and first daughter into the world. She came about two weeks early, which I am very glad. I was so anxious to have her and meet her! :)

I went ahead and delivered via C-section, even though I preferred to have a VBAC. In the end, I went ahead with the C-section out of fear, and I was tired of the pain. I had been having painful contractions for about five days. On the fifth day they were getting closer together and hurting more, so I gave in and went to the hospital.

They checked to see how much I had dilated, and I had only dilated 3-4 cm. After days of contractions!!!! I had waited as long as I could before going to the hospital to increase my chances of having a VBAC, since my doctors really wanted me to have a C-section.

After being weary of the contractions and pain, and fear about things maybe going wrong if I continued to push for a VBAC, I went ahead with the C-section.

So far, praise God, my recovery has been a lot better with this baby than with my last. I am so thankful! My husband has been so helpful and has catered to my needs as I recover and rest. I can't pick up my son while I'm healing, but I manage to find ways to shower him with kisses and hugs and play with him as much as I can.

He hasn't shown any jealousy or anything. He loves to kiss on his baby sister and his face lights up when he sees her.

I feel so blessed right now. I have two beautiful, healthy children, and life just feels great. I thank God for his abundant blessings. He always knows what He's doing, and I have to remind myself sometimes that He knows what's best, and I have to trust in Him.

Beauty of Motherhood

Motherhood can be quite challenging, and a bit frustrating at times. But, I admit, that it is very fulfilling and enjoyable. I didn't expect it to be so much fun and enjoyable, but it is. My in-laws and husband keep telling me that they know I must need a break from my very active little boy. And I do. But, what I consider a break is being able to sleep for 8 hours straight, while someone else gets him back to sleep when he wakes up at 3 a.m. Or having time here and there to fully focus on writing projects. But, I'm comforted by him being near me. Even though it can be exhausting running after him and correcting him and such, I love it because it's part of my job as his mother.

Now he's two hours away with his father who is visiting his parents. I couldn't make the trip, as I'm only about two weeks from my due date. I'm here with my parents in the meantime. And, I miss my baby. I miss his little active, bubbly, happy self. Yes, I'm getting a break, but I don't need a long break from my child. I can't imagine life without him. It wouldn't be as fulfilling and enjoyable, because now that I'm a mother I look at life through a different lens, .

Strangely enough, I have more focus and determination to succeed as a writer and entrepeneur. I take more delight in small things. I enjoy going for walks and watching my baby see the world, and his fascination with everything. Life is just . . . sweeter.

No, motherhood is not exactly easy, but it's definitely something that will make your life and your world more beautiful and exciting.

Leaning on the Lord

I had my baby shower this past Saturday, and I had a great time. It was fun fellowshipping with my family and friends.

I'm excited about my daughter's upcoming arrival, but also kind of scared, because I'm nervous about handling a newborn and a one year old. I'm sure that things will go smoothly, or at least, I pray that they do.

She's due in about two weeks, and my son will be one in four weeks. I definitely need prayer during this time. I just want to be the best mother that I can be, and I don't want to mess up.

I'm getting better at time management, so that's good. I'm learning to go with the flow. What I don't get done with in the morning before my son wakes up, during naptime or after his bedtime, I just have to let that do. Motherhood is the most important priority aside from being a child of God, and a wife. So, I'm learning to just let go, and let God.

I love breastfeeding!

I love breastfeeding, I must admit. While pregnant with my son, I researched breastfeeding and the benefits of it, and I knew that I would breastfeed him. Of course, I heard horror stories from various mothers on the complexities and frustrations of breastfeeding, and how they could only nurse for a few weeks or so, or however long, and they couldn't wait to quit.

Now, the first two weeks were absolutely exhausting to me. I felt like I was nursing all. the. time. But, I loved having him cuddled up beside me while both of us slept peacefully. I took my mother's advice and napped when he napped about twice a day.

He latched on well, so I didn't have problems with that. Sometimes I experienced soreness and such, but for the most part breastfeeding was such a pleasant experience. I loved cuddling up close with him. I loved knowing that my body supplied his nutritional needs. I loved that I could soothe him so easily just by nursing him. Taking care of a baby seemed so much simpler to me. All I basically had to do was nurse him every two hours or so, change his diaper often, and keep him clean. Basically.

Fast forward 11 months. My son will be 11 months in less than two weeks and I still occasionally nurse him. I can't help it. Although I have no milk at this point, because he's basically weaned from my breast, I still nurse to comfort him through the night if he wakes, or during the day when he's in a bad mood. And it still works like a charm.

And, I just can't let go of the joy that I experience having him cuddled near and receiving joy and pacification from me. Luckily, I have a baby coming in about a month, so I can continue nursing with her. To the chagrin of certain family members, and my husband, I'm sure, I will probably still nurse my son for comfort when he needs it. I can't help it. Breastfeeding has been as pleasant an experience for him as it has been for me. I encourage any young mother to nurse, and be open to an absolutely wonderful experience.

Baby decor

Shopping for babies is so much fun. I am so excited about decorating my children's nursery. They will be sharing a room. This weekend I'm getting her crib and will hopefully get the bedding soon. I've already chosen what I want, but I have to save up the funds to get it, and then wait for it to get shipped. I'm excited nonetheless. I've never been much of a shopper. I've just never enjoyed it that much. I considered it a necessary evil. But, from having children, I have developed a love for shopping. There are so many beautiful clothes, shoes, and other things that I really want to get for them.

I try not to go to the malls too much, because then it's hard to stay in my budget. I try to go out only when I have the money to purchase something, and I'm looking for something specific. But, I must admit that I've been guilty of purchasing extra items that were not necessities, but they were so cute that I couldn't pass them up.
I definitely have to discipline myself in this area, or it could get out of hand. But, baby stuff is just sooooo cute!!!