Transitions

Last week I went to a Christian school open house. My son will be starting kindergarten this fall, and I have mixed feelings about it. I have been homeschooling for preschool, but my husband is not on board for homeschooling for K-12. So, I have been looking at Christian schools in my area to see what might be a good fit.

I liked the one last week, but wasn't totally impressed with it. After leaving the open house I felt so depressed. When we got home I kept looking at my precious little boy, and sadness overwhelmed me and I began to cry. He's still my baby, and I'm not ready to depart from him just yet.

This baby is coming at a great time, I suppose. Maybe I will be so engulfed in caring for a new baby, that it will ease the pain of my oldest entering kindergarten.

Maybe.

Waiting for Baby

I'm pretty excited and anxious about meeting my new little one. I'm also kind of excited and scared about labor. You know how when you're really excited about something the time seems to drag? Well, I feel like this pregnancy is going slowly, although I know it really isn't.

So, I've been focusing my mind on a few things:

*Enjoying every minute that I can with my two children. My goal is to get out of the house each day and do something fun that they would enjoy from now until the baby comes. It will be a fun adventure for all of us, and it's great bonding time. Today we went to the mall and I let them play in the children's zone, and they had a blast. We then ate lunch in the food court, and had ice cream cones. Then we walked around the mall, and I did a bit of shopping.

*Organizing/Decorating my home. I'm in super nesting mode. For the past few weeks I have been consumed with decorating thoughts and ideas, and ways that I want to spruce up our home before the baby gets here. I feel a sense of accomplishment when I organize and slowly decorate our place.

*Continuing to read childbirth books. I absolutely love reading about childbirth and mothering.

*Making sure that I complete most of my online master's work ahead of time, so that it's done with before baby gets here. Now, if I had excellent forethought, I would have just not taken any classes this semester, but I was not exercising smart thinking. Not sure if I've shared, but a year ago I started my Master's in School Library Media. Although I got recertified to teach, if I have to go back to a full or part time job, I would love for it to be in a school library. In a few years it would be ideal, I think, to work part-time as a school librarian. But, it would be even more ideal to work successfully from home doing something that involves books or something else that I love.

So, I have enough going on that I'm not too anxious about our pending arrival. But, I can't wait to meet her, and the children are so excited too!

Have You Had A Doula?

So, I'm about seven weeks away from my due date. Writing that just now made me nervous, because that is pretty soon! :) As I've mentioned before, I am trying to go for a VBAC this time around. Part of me is accepting of having to have a C-section again if I have to, but I really want to experience a vaginal birth.

With that said, I'm considering hiring a doula. I've read that doula's can make such a positive difference with giving birth. I wanted to know if anyone out there has had a doula, and is it something that you would highly recommend? Or did you think you could have done just as well on your own?

The Midwife review

I mentioned the other week that I loved reading a wonderful novel called, The Midwife by Gay Couter. I give the book five out of five stars. I normally do not etch out time out of my schedule to consistently read a book, but I did with this one.

It is the story of Hannah, a young midwife in training, and eventually certified midwife, who blossoms as a young woman amidst a tumultous time in Russia for Jews during the 1900's. After moving to America with her family to seek a better life, she quickly establishes herself as a competent and trusted midwife, who assists births at women's homes.

I was so enthralled with the descriptions of the various births that Hannah attended. The writing of this novel is superb, keeping readers fascinated with the process of birth, and the blessings of having a competent midwife to assist in childbirth. I loved reading about a young woman who was passionate about birth, and one of the most skilled and respected midwives in her area. It was an inspiring and informative read, and I would encourage any woman to read the book. There are some parts of it that I didn't agree with or support the heroine's choices, but overall, I think this is a great book, that most will find worthy of five stars.

The Midwife

Happy New Year everyone!!

I have enjoyed a wonderful holiday season. I told my husband that having young children brings the excitement back into Christmas. Christmas from around the teen years and beyond isn't quite as exciting as Christmas when you are little. It seemed magical as a child, because I believed in Santa Claus, and there was so much anticipation to see what was under the Christmas tree.

The older I got the more the magic faded away. I still enjoyed Christmas very much, but there was no magical element there. But, having children brings that magic back for some reason. I guess because you get to witness their excitement.

Something I have also enjoyed for the past week or so has been reading an excellent book! Prior to getting marrried and having children, I was a voracious novel reader. After having children I cut back a lot on my reading. A lot. Mainly because when I get into a book I like to keep reading, and it was frustrating to read and have to stop continuously.

Another reason was because I just had not found a lot of good books that were worth trying to continue reading. But, I recently read one of the best books that I've read in a long time.

As I'm approaching my sixth month of pregnancy, of course I have been reading anything related to pregnancy. Mainly nonfiction works. But, I found a great fiction novel, called The Midwife by Gay Courter. I found it at my local library and I was hooked from the first few pages. I loved this book! Childbirth is fascinating to me anyways, more so right now of course, because I'll be giving birth in a few months. The writing was excellent, and although it was a very long book, I savored each moment of reading it. I just finished reading it, and I have to give a full review of it in a few days at least. I'm also going to get the sequel tomorrow and begin reading it.

I can't wait!

Back Home

I'm finally done with my teacher certification program!! This is my first week back home full time with my children, and it's been great. My husband had been home during the day with them, but he started school fulltime, which the military pays for, last week.

The children are excited about the baby in my tummy. At least once a week my son asks me if the baby is going to come out now. He's anxious to meet his new sibling.

I'm five months along, and I'm deciding on whether to switch to a more VBAC friendly doctor. The one I chose, I thought was VBAC friendly, but she said that she only supports vaginal births after one c-section, and I have had two.

I'm nervous about trying for a VBAC, and I'm nervous about possibly having another C-section. I try not to think about it too much, and stay positive. I have been reading a lot of great posts through ICAN, specifically I Can of Atlanta's message board. It has been inspiring to read so many VBAC success stories.

30

Today is my 30th birthday. (Sigh. . . ) No, really, I'm happy to begin a new decade of life, and I am thankful for all that God has blessed me with. Even unexpected surprises.

A while ago I blogged about yearning for a baby, but in my head I knew that it was not a wise time to have another child. I guess God had other plans, because I'm expecting number 3. I honestly can't believe it, and writing it here makes it seem more real.

I've read biblical womanhood type blogs for quite some time now, and have read about how women should joyfully anticipate the birth of any children God chooses to bless them with, and allowing God to plan your family and so forth. I think there is some merit to that.

But, can I admit that I am both happy and anxious/nervous about having another child?

I feel mostly confident that I can handle it in stride, but a part of me is nervous that parenting three children will be very overwhelming. The other part of me can't wait to hold, snuggle, and nurse this new little person.

Anyways, I'm thankful for all of my children on my special birthday and my entire family for their support and love.

My goal this year is to really work hard to accomplish my dreams of being a published author, to become a better cook because I'm really bored with my repertoire of meals, and to remember to enjoy each and every day to the fullest with my loved ones, and not waste energy on trivial matters.

Have a wonderful day!